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Pondoff's Anonymous

Pondoff's Anonymous

By: Chris Pondoff Jeff Allen Jakob Miller
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About this listen

 Pondoff's Anonymous is the unfiltered recovery podcast that says the quiet part out loud. Hosted by Chris Pondoff, Jeff Allen, and Jakob Miller, this show brings real conversations about addiction, recovery, and everything in between — no sugarcoating, no bullshit. It’s not polished. It’s not perfect. It’s honest. Each episode dives deep into the stories behind relapse, trauma, shame, growth, and the hard f*cking work of getting better. You’ll hear from addicts, sober warriors, and the people who walk beside them — including friends, family, and the ones who stuck around when shit got dark.Chris Pondoff, Jeff Allen, Jakob Miller Hygiene & Healthy Living Psychology Psychology & Mental Health
Episodes
  • S2 E21 Chris and Angela Schenewerk

    S2 E21 Chris and Angela Schenewerk
    Jun 23 2025
    Who this episode is for:
    • Anyone who woke up with a Great Dane puppy and no memory of ordering it
    • The families still trying to love a tornado in human form
    • Addicts who’ve checked into rehab more times than they can count (Angela’s got you beat)
    • People in recovery, people out of recovery, people still circling the drain
    • Folks not in recovery but who’ve ever made a mess of their life and are wondering, “Now what?”

    Chris and Jeff wrangle the now-married madness that is Angela and Dr. Chris Schenewerk—back for Round 3, but this time in the same damn room. And buckle up, because it gets unhinged in the best way.

    There’s a five-grand Great Dane bought during a blackout. Jellyfish revelations. Dead ducks. Rehab round twelve. Boobs paid for by Angela (not her husband, thank you very much). Grief, laughter, rage, and a recovery meeting started in a damn bowling alley.

    This episode’s a cocktail of chaos, clarity, and hard-won perspective. Recovery ain't a straight line—and this couple proves it’s still worth crawling the damn thing.

    Timestamp Breakdown
    • 0:00 – Knife talk and sponsor shoutouts
    • 2:00 – Angela and Dr. Chris together: Zeus the blackout puppy, John Wick the dog
    • 5:00 – Angela’s animal kingdom: jellyfish, wood ducks, and regretful Amazon buys
    • 10:00 – Clean Cause gets the spotlight (use code: PONDOFF for 20% off at cleancause.com)
    • 15:00 – Dr. Chris opens up about losing his brother and not drinking through it
    • 20:00 – Angela breaks down 12 rehabs, chaos, and what finally clicked
    • 25:00 – Kids and the wreckage they witness—Angela owns her side of the street
    • 30:00 – The “Three Amigos” Friday AA meeting is born in a bowling alley
    • 35:00 – Dr. Chris’s recovery workbook—text him, he’ll mail you a copy
    • 40:00 – Sobriety labels are dumb—just do the work
    • 45:00 – Pandemic recovery meetings, muting drunk people on Zoom
    • 55:00 – Rehab myths, boobs, and doing the next right thing
    • 1:00:00 – Jersey trauma, 9/11 aftermath, and losing Jimmy
    • 1:10:00 – Bridging recovery at Memorial Hospital—pamphlets, meetings, hope
    • 1:20:00 – Bird jokes, orchid addiction, prostate talk—classic chaos
    • 1:30:00 – Remembering Brian Schenewerk, prayer, and promising more babies
    Sh*t to Check Out
    • Clean Cause Energy Drinks – 20% off with code PONDOFF
    • Illinois Recovery Center
    • Bertarelli Cutlery
    • AA Meeting Finder
    • Memorial Hospital Detox Bridge Program
    Sponsor Shoutout

    This glorious mess brought to you by Illinois Recovery Center and Bertarelli Cutlery—because sharp knives and sharp minds save lives.
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    1 hr and 46 mins
  • S2 E20 The Science of Addiction | Pondoff's Anonymous x No Lions Here Crossover Episode

    S2 E20 The Science of Addiction | Pondoff's Anonymous x No Lions Here Crossover Episode
    Jun 16 2025
    Crossover Chaos: The Science of Addiction Who this episode is for:
    • Anyone who’s ever stared down their own addictions
    • Families who don’t get why their loved one can’t “just stop”
    • The “I’m not an addict, but I totally have addictive behaviors” crowd
    • People obsessed with the science behind why their brains keep screwing them over
    • Therapy nerds, recovery warriors, and dudes who need to get over being "too tough" to talk about emotions
    • And of course — anyone who’s ever made a complete dumpster fire of their life
    🎧 Crossover Chaos: The Science of Addiction — Jakob Miller x Big Panda

    This one’s a little different. Jakob Miller from Pondoff’s Anonymous links up with Alex “Big Panda” Kaiser for a crossover between Pondoff’s Anonymous and No Lions Here. It’s raw, unfiltered, and exactly what you’d expect when two recovering addicts sit down and try to explain the brain science behind addiction without sounding like nerdy scientists.

    Jakob breaks down his "Science of Addiction" class that he runs at Illinois Recovery Center — and finally records it for the masses. If you’ve ever sat in a treatment center, argued whether addiction is a disease, or wondered why you keep sabotaging your own life, this one’s for you.

    They cover it all: trauma, dopamine, irrational thinking, relapse symptoms, why triggers are a scam, and how to hack your own brain before it tricks you back into using.

    No sugarcoating. No bullshit. Just the real, uncomfortable truth about how addiction rewires your survival system and why emotional honesty might be the one thing that saves your life.

    🧪 Resources Mentioned:
    • Illinois Recovery Center — https://illinoisrecoverycenter.com
    • No Lions Here Podcast — https://open.spotify.com/show/57389wCMh6z9aZgNqjgUSd?si=ffed6a42d19043c5
    ⏱ Full Episode Breakdown:
    • 0:00 — Intro & Crossover Explained
    • 1:25 — Jakob's Science of Addiction class: origins & goals
    • 5:00 — Breaking down the “disease” model: treatable, not curable
    • 8:15 — Trauma vs. addiction: Jakob's personal story
    • 14:00 — The switch theory: when addiction gets "turned on"
    • 19:00 — The 4 key symptoms that predict relapse
    • 25:00 — Obsession, self-centeredness, irrational thinking, compulsion: deep dive
    • 32:00 — Dopamine 101: how the brain wires addiction as survival
    • 38:30 — Functional MRI studies: your cravings vs starvation
    • 44:00 — Cravings, urges, triggers: why most coping advice is useless
    • 48:00 — Hacking the brain with Navy SEAL tricks & cognitive exercises
    • 54:00 — Practicing coping skills: the only way they actually start to work
    • 59:00 — 90-in-90 meetings: how to taper off the right way
    • 1:03:00 — Emotional intelligence: why men must feel their shit
    • 1:09:00 — Jakob’s personal triggers and early relapse warning signs
    • 1:15:00 — Drug choice is irrelevant: a dopamine problem is a dopamine problem
    • 1:21:00 — How irrational thinking nearly killed Jakob
    • 1:26:00 — Emotional honesty and real recovery work for men
    • 1:32:00 — Wrapping it up: facing emotions head-on to stay alive
    Sponsored by
    • Illinois Recovery Center
    • Bertarelli Cutlery
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    1 hr and 6 mins
  • BONUS: Cristina Preston Re-Release

    BONUS: Cristina Preston Re-Release
    Jun 9 2025
    Who this episode is for: Anyone outworking pain in the gymFolks from good homes who wrecked their livesPeople with pasts they swore they’d never shareAnyone who’s felt like a fraud—addict or notChurch kids hiding chaos behind smiles Chris is on a Staten Island ferry, pizza grease on his fingers, yelling at Lady Liberty and eating humble pie ‘cause the remote-record plan tanked. But that tech fail is your gain—because we’re re-dropping a raw convo with Cristina Preston: fitness model, news junkie, steroid-using bodybuilder, trafficking survivor, and miracle in motion. She leads Celebrate Recovery in Fenton, MO, but she’s lived the wreckage—bullying, self-harm, covering a school shooting, being trafficked during addiction, shady doctors, and a Vegas wedding that made her dad cry the wrong way. This one’s heavy and holy. Laugh. Cry. Throw a chair. Hug your mom. ⏱️ Full Timestamp Breakdown 00:00 – Ferry intro: busted tech & grandma’s 100th01:50 – Why this is a re-release03:20 – Goldberg tease: Ducks, meth, mayhem04:05 – Cristina joins: war-tested & real05:30 – How Chris found Cristina’s testimony06:45 – Celebrate Recovery ain’t just AA08:15 – Codependency, food, image issues09:20 – Why “grateful believer” hits different10:30 – Honesty over polish11:15 – CR outnumbers Starbucks?!12:20 – Church-run, same vibe everywhere13:45 – Big lessons, big tears14:50 – Pondoff talks real recovery spaces16:05 – Why safe doesn’t mean soft17:45 – Losing a dog in sobriety20:00 – Sitting in pain instead of escaping22:00 – Cristina’s “perfect” upbringing23:30 – Bullying & broken stalls25:30 – Before we knew “anxiety”27:15 – The high-achieving mask28:10 – Speech team nerd to newsroom30:00 – Covering the NIU school shooting32:45 – Trauma, Valentine’s, heartbreak34:20 – Cancelled wedding, lost faith36:50 – Panic attacks & silence38:45 – Gym life as addiction in disguise40:30 – Attention, abs, and adrenaline42:00 – Bikini comps & pressure43:45 – First steroid cycle45:00 – “Helpful” doctor + real side effects46:30 – Vegas wedding, mall ring, regrets48:15 – Cocaine enters stage right50:10 – Using on the move51:30 – Broke, exposed, unraveling53:00 – Dependent and out of options54:10 – Doctor with blank-label pills55:30 – Lies, performance, denial57:10 – Who even am I?58:45 – Comfort in chaos01:00:00 – From worshipped to wasted01:01:30 – Realizing it’s all a façade01:03:00 – Surrender & grace01:05:00 – Truth through accountability01:06:20 – Living life again01:07:45 – Family healing01:09:00 – Second marriage, no lies01:10:15 – Parenthood post-recovery01:12:00 – Telling your kids the truth01:13:20 – Sharing to save others01:14:40 – Message to the struggling01:16:00 – How to plug into CR01:17:30 – Church ≠ performance01:19:00 – What healing really means01:20:20 – Sobriety doesn’t erase shame01:23:00 – Self-forgiveness is brutal01:25:00 – Cristina opens up: trafficked in addiction01:27:30 – Manipulated, silenced by shame01:29:00 – Her son asks the hard questions01:32:10 – Even now, cravings sneak in01:34:45 – Triggers: mirrors, songs, stores01:38:20 – Faith in the ugly middle01:40:50 – Leading while healing01:44:10 – Routine, friends, raw prayer01:47:00 – “You’re not too far gone”01:50:30 – Chris on public shame & honesty01:53:00 – Jakob & Jeff on spiritual BS01:55:45 – Cristina hated “Christianese” too01:58:20 – Healing doesn’t follow rules02:00:10 – Why CR keeps her grounded02:03:30 – Sobriety is sacred and simple02:06:00 – Stories evolve—they don’t end02:10:00 – Gratitude for lifelines02:12:45 – “Stay here”—for anyone slipping02:15:30 – Chris signs off from the ferry02:17:40 – END 🙏 Sponsor Shoutout: Illinois Recovery Center – Putting broken pieces back together. 👉 https://illinoisrecoverycenter.com/Bertarelli Cutlery – Blades that slice through your bullshit. 👉 https://bertarellico.com/
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    2 hrs and 18 mins
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