So Gay for You cover art

So Gay for You

Friendship, Found Family, and the Show That Started It All

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So Gay for You

By: Kate Moennig, Leisha Hailey
Narrated by: Kate Moennig, Leisha Hailey
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About this listen

*AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER*

An intimate, hilarious memoir of art, friendship, queerness, and found family, written and read by Kate Moennig and Leisha Hailey, stars of The L Word—including never-before-shared stories from behind the scenes of the show and their personal lives. This program includes an exclusive bonus Q&A with fans' questions.

"Are you comfortable with nudity?" my manager asked.

In the early 2000s, Kate Moennig and Leisha Hailey—both young artists trying to figure it all out—met at auditions for an unknown little TV show. Given that it was a show about lesbians living in Los Angeles, with the first ever ensemble cast of openly queer female characters, Kate and Leisha knew the project was going to be unlike anything else out there—that is, if it even got picked up.

Then, one million people watched the premiere. The show, which came to be called The L Word, turned into a trailblazing phenomenon. Its influence on pop culture, in the political arena, and in the lives of viewers has been lasting, impactful, even life-saving. And in addition to changing the course of television history, The L Word changed Kate and Leisha's lives forever.

From their first day on set, Kate and Leisha have always had each other’s backs, inseparable to the degree that the cast joked they were like a pair of pants—you couldn't have one leg without the other. Hence the name for their branded partnership, PANTS, launched in 2020, and accompanying podcast, which has been downloaded over twenty million times.

This friendship has seen Kate and Leisha through their greatest triumphs and most painful moments, stumbling from closeted queer kids in a hostile culture, to LGBTQ+ activists, actors, podcasters, and business owners. Full of never-before-shared glimpses into the making of The L Word, Kate and Leisha's real-life loves and losses, and their experience as queer icons, So Gay for You is a heartfelt, inspiring love letter to a ride or die friendship over the decades, and a testament to the liberating power of chosen family.

A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.

©2025 Katherine Moennig and Leisha Hailey (P)2025 Macmillan Audio
Biographies & Memoirs Editors Select Entertainment & Celebrities Entertainment & Performing Arts Film & TV LGBTQIA+ Creators Funny Heartfelt Witty Friendship Queer

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Editorial Review

The girls in tight dresses are back!
If you were a fan of the Showtime 2004 hit show The L Word or the 2019 reboot The L Word: Generation Q, you don’t want to miss the behind-the-scenes anecdotes dished in Kate Moennig’s (Shane) and Leisha Hailey’s (Alice) new listen, So Gay for You. I couldn’t help but become giddy at the personal stories revealed by the two actresses who played my favorite characters. Showcasing Kate and Leisha’s longstanding friendship and memorable moments on set, So Gay for You is a trip down an unforgettable lane of their lives that has bonded them for a lifetime. Narrated by Kate and Leisha themselves, it’s hard not to enjoy the energy they have between them, which really drives home how the show created everlasting bonds among the cast. This listen was enjoyable from start to finish. —Nicole R., Audible Editor

Critic reviews

"So Gay for You is more than a memoir; it's a comprehensive almanac of Kate Moennig and Leisha Hailey. Take it from a die-hard fan, and friend, this intimate exploration of their lives blends candid anecdotes with reflections on their youth, queer identity, the impact of The L Word, and perhaps most importantly, their two decades of friendship. Must-read queer lit and a testament to the enduring legacy of The L Word and the culture-changing stars at its heart."—Tegan Quin, bestselling author of High School

"So Gay for You is a beautiful story of two besties who also played besties on the ground breaking series The L Word. Read this book, you will love it as I did."—Rosie O'Donnell

"As magnetic and authentic as Kate and Leisha themselves, So Gay for You feels like catching up with an old friend. Hilarious, candid, and full of heart, this memoir perfectly captures the ups and downs of the 2000s and beyond, and the life-changing power of true, lasting found family."—Gwyneth Paltrow

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I loved hearing all the behind the scenes secrets from The L Word and The L Word Gen Q . A joy to listen to. I laughed. I cried. Thank you.

Fantastic

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I didn’t know I needed to know any of the things these two authors talk about in this book. However it was wonderful to listen too. It perhaps could have got down a little deeper into their thoughts and feelings but overall it was very satisfying as a memoir. You don’t need to know anything about the L Word to enjoy it but I think it helped that I watched it when it first aired. It had me struggling to remember character and actors from the show. Nice memories for myself and for the authors.

What a nice surprise

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It’s lovely to experience a book that, at its heart, is purely about female friendship. It’s such a precious thing that’s not celebrated enough. As a big L Word fan, it was great to find out more about how it all came together and how these two women became huge parts of each other’s lives. We can all wish to find our person in life, the one that just gets us.

Female friendship

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I enjoyed their honesty in revealing parts about themselves they hadn’t previously.
I loved the throwbacks to the L Word because it was such a great series and it’s great to hear they had as much fun doing it as we did watching it.

Some real insight into how these people began

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I enjoyed this audio book as it took me back to the start of the L Word. How soon we forget....how far things have come.
Worth a listen and you also see a different side to the actors

Made me smile

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I loved when they did different voices it cracked me up! Thank you guys for putting your stories out there and making it easier for the rest of us to know things do get better 😊

I love these pair of pants!

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Great listen. A book but two lovely warm friends and their journey of lesbian discovery and the reality of acting life and inspiring other women

Honest friendship

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Kate & Leisha honestly came across as such down to earth, warm friendly, happy go lucky try anything once, then maybe do it all again friends I would love hang out with, I fell in love with the L word when it first hit the screens 20ish years ago, I wanted to love Gen Q but it didn’t have the same vibe I sadly gave up watching but it listening to this book, hearing the backstories the guilt on not loving GenQ has dissipated, I have loved Alice, Shane, Bet and Tina but I love the normal besties behind PANTS more now I think, be yourselves, keep doing what you are doing and thanks for accompanying me on some long drives recently it’s been a blast!

I learnt, I laughed, I want to be in their tribe!

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I love this book. I am a huge fan of the l word because as you both said it was great to have a program about lesbains which we had never seen before as a lesbain it was great to have a program about other lesbains. the book has made me hugely admire the 2 of you because of your honesty your journey and the fact you are both great at DIY. please buy this book it's great. I actually listened to it on audible and now I have just ordered a hard copy. I would highly recommend audible as it's Kate and Leisha reading the book. Then listen to their podcast Pants.

fantastic book

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A really rewarding listen. Lesbian history, lessons learned, good times and rough patches. Friendship and core values explored. Up beat.

A friendship memoir

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