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Two Necromancers, a Bureaucrat, and an Army of Golems
- An Unconventional Heroes Publisher's Pack
- Narrated by: Fred Berman
- Length: 13 hrs and 5 mins
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Summary
Contains Books 1 and 2 of the Unconventional Heroes series.
Two Necromancers, a Bureaucrat, and an Elf, book 1:
Two necromancers, a bureaucrat, and an elf - it sounds like the start of a bad joke, only the joke is on Timmy.
Timothy Walter Bolton - better known as Timmy - has spent most of his life as a necromancer. When he isn't terrorising his enemies, he's plotting inside his castle, which is built on top of lightless chasms filled with nameless horrors and beings of a generally malevolent and megalomaniacal nature. But after one of his latest creations, a zombie hydra-dragon-bear, tries to eat him, he decides that maybe it's time to find a new, less dangerous, career.
But that's easier said than done. He's a wanted criminal with no shortage of powerful (and crazy) enemies, and he has a bone or two to pick with the Everton Council of Mages.
It's a good thing that he's got some help: an obnoxious 10-year-old apprentice who thinks that pink glasses are appropriate for a budding necromancer and a bumbling bureaucrat who may or may not make it through their first real fight without puking his guts up. Wonderful.
Two Necromancers, an Army of Golems, and a Demon Lord, book 2:
Two necromancers, an army of golems, and a demon lord - it sounds like a recipe for trouble, and for Timmy, it definitely is.
To earn his pardon and avoid horrible torture and/or gruesome execution, Timmy has to complete every mission the Council throws his way, most of which seem to involve extremely scary things trying to kill him. At least he’s got help - sort of. His help consists of an apprentice with designs on his castle (and her plans may or may not involve overthrowing him), a bureaucrat whose two greatest skills are fainting in the face of trouble and using people (usually Timmy) as human shields, and an elf with the world's worst case of pyromania and enough magic to level a mountain.
Somehow, Timmy's got to get this bunch of unconventional heroes to work together. Trouble is coming, and it's trouble of the kind that only a necromancer like Timmy could possibly find himself in the middle of.
What listeners say about Two Necromancers, a Bureaucrat, and an Army of Golems
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- Anonymous User
- 07-06-22
epic
the story kept me so ingrosed I couldn't put it down thank you epic
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- HKL
- 02-04-23
Playful take
Good fun, I'd definitely want to be in this D&D party! 😁
Performance captured the Timmy character brilliantly, and I rapidly stopped being faintly annoyed by the young girl's voice as she became a more rounded character too. No complaints here
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- Amazon Customer
- 05-02-23
brilliant
loved it, pretty good was very different and amusing, and entertaining can't wait to hear more.
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- D with a J and a W
- 20-12-22
unconventional and better for it
funny? yes!
Unconventional? yes!
unusual? yes
listen judge for yourself but for me love it !
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- Amazon Customer
- 20-12-22
excellent
I really enjoyed this audio book, it can be enjoyed by anyone of any age. The narration was brilliant.
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- carly carpenter
- 14-04-23
Loved it
Really loveable characters that I instantly cared about, funny and engaging and brilliantly narrated. I have listened to the whole series of books twice now and am eagerly awaiting the next adventure.
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- Anonymous User
- 18-11-23
Brilliant
Funny, interesting, great narrator and an overall perfect experience.
It is my second listening to the series and it is even better for the second Time.
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- Mrs. G. J. March
- 21-10-23
Wry funny well performed dungeons and dragons almost spoof
I especially appreciated getting this as part of my Audible membership- a real find and I hope there are more.
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- RH
- 31-01-24
Not what I expected
It was very funny in unexpected places. The voice acting is a delight. Definitely gave each character their own personality and was very consistent!. I picked this up as a random find as the book title was funny. I'm very glad I did. I've picked up all the following books in the series and I'm now going to work my way through with Timmy and his unconventional family!! Definitely worth a listen!
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- Dragonfly1502
- 03-10-22
I laughed out loud on several occasions
If you enjoy fantasy adventure with a sense of humour then these books are for you.
If you like d&d adventure then if you’ll probably relate to a lot of these scenarios.
It’s funny and dark humoured which is delivered brilliantly by the narrator.
I really enjoyed these books and I’m looking forward to the next one. I’m just a little sad that they only seem to be available online as I would love to buy a paperback version to keep!
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