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The Amateurs

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The Amateurs

By: John Niven
Narrated by: Angus King
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About this listen

Gary is a sweet and decent man. Only two things would improve his life - having children with his gorgeous wife, Pauline, and a lower golf handicap. Both are unlikely.

Pauline is wondering how she ended up living in an ugly little house, driving a second-hand car and making a living dressing up as Tinker Bell. She's planning to leave Gary for a self-made carpet millionaire.

Findlay, the Carpet King of Scotland, wants to trade in his obese wife for a younger model. But if he goes for a divorce, she'll take him to the cleaners. If only there was some way she could be made to disappear....

Lee, Gary's luckless brother, has botched one too many drug deals. Local crime overlord Ranta Campbell gives him one more job - one last chance to get it right. Lee's done some bad things - but murder?

When Gary gets smashed on the head by a golf ball and miraculously develops an absolutely perfect swing, everyone finds their fates rest on the final day of the Open Championship....

©2015 John Niven (P)2015 Random House AudioBooks Crime Crime Thrillers Thriller Thriller & Suspense Fiction Funny Feel-Good Witty Golf Suspense Sports Marriage

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All stars
Most relevant  
Funniest and most uplifting book that I have listened to so far. You don't have to be a golfer to enjoy this book but if you are a golfer, you will love it.

So funny

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Another great read from John Niven , great story and again had me laughing out loud ! Also great performance, only issue wasn’t long enough.

Laughing all the way

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Laughed all the way through, didn’t want it to end, great story, almost believable and expertly narrated. 10/10

“****ing Pure Magic”

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All of the accents completely made this for me. John Niven at his very best.

Amazing performance

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What a fantastic, gripping, and hilarious story. Brilliant narration. Highly recommended for any golf fan!

Superb

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So you're an amateur golfer who can't get below 18 until a freak accident gets you to scratch and The Open with only a few minor and hilarious side effects ie Tourette's Syndrome and a permanent boner! Cue significant absurdity and hilarity in typically outlandish Niven fashion. This is a very funny book and I recommend it.

Every Amateur Golfer's Dream

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I found it a lot more enjoyable than Kill Your Friends. It’s easy going and at times laugh out loud funny (which is rare for a book). There’s a real feel-good element to narrative come the end, also. Was a nice break from reading heavy literature!

An easy to read, genuinely funny, dark-comedy

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this book is the funniest ive ever read, with a beautiful story of interlinking flawed characters.

fantastically funny

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I listen to this during my commute to work. my fellow commuters must think me very strange for the number of times I'd burst out laughing for no apparent reason!

Laugh out loud all the way through!

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If you don't enjoy this or appreciate how observant it I probably don't want to know you.

outstanding

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