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When Men Behave Badly
- The Hidden Roots of Sexual Deception, Harassment, and Assault
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 10 hrs and 47 mins
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Summary
“An exceptional book” (Helen Fisher) by a leading evolutionary psychologist and sex researcher that lays out a new theory of sexual conflict, exposing the roots of the dangerous dynamics that underpin men’s predatory behavior - and what can be done to address it.
Sexual conflict permeates ancient religions, from injunctions about thy neighbor's wife to the permissible rape of infidels. It is etched in written laws that dictate who can and cannot have sex with whom. Its manifestations shape our sexual morality, evoking approving accolades or contemptuous condemnation. It produces sexual double standards that flourish even in the most sexually egalitarian cultures on earth. And although every person alive struggles with sexual conflict, most of us see only the tip of the iceberg: dating deception, a politician's unsavory sexual grab, the slow crumbling of a once-happy marriage, a romantic breakup that turns nasty.
When Men Behave Badly shows that this "battle of the sexes" is deeper and far more pervasive than anyone has recognized, revealing the hidden roots of sexual conflict - roots that originated over deep evolutionary time - which define the sexual psychology we currently carry around in our 3.5-pound brains. Providing novel insights into our minds and behaviors, When Men Behave Badly presents a unifying new theory of sexual conflict, and offers practical advice for men and women seeking to avoid it.
What listeners say about When Men Behave Badly
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- Anonymous User
- 13-03-23
Worth it
Good information. Chapter on rape is too long. This book explains why there's sexual conflict between men and women. Women want sex with the best men out there.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Pepe
- 07-09-23
80% good, last 20% poor
The scientific section of this book, which takes most of it, is quite good an interesting. It does repeat a bit what David Buss has already explain in his other book, even to the point of using the same examples. Yet, it is good.
As you may imagine from the title, the focus is about men abusing women, so the opposite situation where a women takes advantage of a man's resources is not discussed at all. There seems to be not much research on it apparently.
The final chapter or so is political and even gets into contradictions with the basic ideas discussed in the rest of book. After all, David is just another human in today's world and when he gest political he also seems to lose sight of his own science. You can omit it safely as that last chapter has the same insights you would get from a stranger in a pub.
Overall, the book is good and the research work is solid.
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- Anonymous User
- 05-05-22
When Women Have Autonomy
Buss does a fabulous job navigating the treacherous waters of sexual misconduct. He actively keeps the reader (listener) aware of the ambiguity of research in this field and successfully brings it back to a priori statements of evolution / adaptation. His actionable insights into mismatches between women's and men's mating objectives luminates a path towards a world in which women are less exploited and assaulted.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Rianne Gayle
- 01-11-21
Easy listen
This really made me change me perception on certain sexual differences between men and women. I found it a really easy and quite engaging listen
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anna
- 26-08-21
Very interesting. Worth a read.
Full of insights. Learnt a lot. For me it felt like there was just something missing though? I’m terms of how easy it was to follow or something. Not sure what. Still recommend, but that’s just why it’s 4 stars from me.
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- Ismael Gutierrez
- 01-11-21
A much-needed book
This is a much-needed book about male sexual behaviour.
The first half of the book treats the historical relationship between heterosexual men and women and the sexual gaps between both genders. It is an outstanding piece in the field anthropology.
The second half is much more suited to the field of criminology. The author delves into the darker side of the male brain and presents the latest available research on male sexual violence, and the best suitable solutions (spoiler alert: prevention and education).
All in all, a stupendous read although please be advised: it gets rougher and cruder in the latter chapters.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Kim Lyons
- 30-12-21
Thought provoking
Very interesting book. Thought provoking and definitely worth reading. Easy to listen too. Good examples of how men and women see things very differently
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1 person found this helpful
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- Adam
- 05-04-24
Comprehensive, insightful, and research based
Something that everybody should read/listen to! Provides insight into so many fundamental behaviours of both men and women, and once familiar with these you can see and recognise them in everyday life as well as in media and pop culture.
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- N D
- 29-07-21
Written in Fear
I’ve listened to/read a few of the author’s titles. A lot of the information in the book reflects his status in the field. At times the book gets particularly dark, so I took some time away from it to lighten my perspective on life.
Returning to the book, I do feel that there are lessons everyone could benefit from. However, the author spends increasing amounts of time trying to appease the imagined critic. This gets tedious fast.
The author also makes some oversights in adopting this stance, such as when stating that men can’t understand what sexual assault is like for women. I don’t know if men can, I also don’t know if studies have been attempted, comparing the reports of male victims of sexual assault. It’s possible it is different, because of the risk of pregnancy, for example. Alternative gender identities would need to be considered in a thorough assessment too.
My point is - stick to the science. I would have thought this would be especially important to an Evo Psych, considering the common attacks of the discipline.
Also, I think the proposed solutions reach a limit when neuroscience isn’t considered in more depth. The role of hormones and neurotransmitters, etc. In the salience of mate choice. Proposing that people should change mate preferences, as if they are changing a brand of cereal, just didn’t seem plausible.
This book was written in fear of reprisals.
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5 people found this helpful